My Boss and the Importance of Always Being Thankful

"If you concentrate on finding whatever is good in every situation, you will discover that your life will suddenly be filled with gratitude, a feeling that nurtures the soul."

Rabbi Harold Kushner

I believe that everyone always has something to be thankful for. Regardless of how many problems you might have, if you look hard enough, you can always find something good happening in your life. For me, that something has been my boss and my Company.

About 8 months before I was diagnosed, I decided to change jobs. A new opportunity was presented to me by a friend and it was too good to pass up. This new job, as an associate at a small investment firm in Orange County, CA, would give me the opportunity to travel abroad, meet new people, work on challenging and exciting projects, and of course, make more money. At the time I was about to turn 24 and all these prospects were very enticing. So, even though I enjoyed my current job working in Los Angeles, I decided to make the switch.

The first time I met the owner of this firm, I seriously began to reconsider that decision (he had been traveling abroad when I accepted the job so I never got a chance to meet him then). After introducing myself to him, he began rapidly asking me questions about myself, my past job and my college experience. It was like a lightning round and I was on the hot seat. I soon came to realize that he was just having some fun with me, something that he likes to do often. He then assigned me my first project, giving me so few details about what he wanted that I spent most of the afternoon and evening just scratching my head, wondering if there way any possible way I could do it right.

But after we moved past these initial bizarre encounters and I learned more about his style, I realized that he was an incredibly sharp man with an incredibly short attention span. I figured I could deal with that. His best quality though would be his limitless generosity, which I would come to find out about later.

The morning after I was diagnosed I woke up in my apartment and got ready to go back to the hospital for more testing. My cellphone rang and it was my boss. He told me that he was sorry for what happened to me, and that someone so young should never be burdened with such a challenge. He told me that he appreciated all the work I'd done and that he and his family would be there to support me. He asked me how I was feeling, and I told him I was scared, but that I felt that I could beat it. He said that I should stay positive, fight, and not give up. We ended the conversation on that note and I left for the hospital. Shortly after I received this email from him...

"I have a sense that the course of your treatment will take between 9 months and a year. During that time, you will remain on the payroll, and continue to get paid bonuses as they are paid out. We will also pay for you to live at Parkview (the apartment my Mom and I lived at in Hong Kong) for as long as you would like to.

Over the next year, I do not expect you to do any finance related work. Your job will be to do the following:

1. Learn as much as you can about your cancer, the treatment options, and what progress to expect.
2. Speak to as many doctors as possible about your specific treatment and make sure you’re informed about the decisions you are making.
3. Get better.

You are part of the (Company name) family. Sometimes that involves dressing up like an elf (I had dressed up as an elf for the Christmas party). Sometimes that involves letting us support you while you get better. Take as long as you need, and rest assured that your job and everything you’re doing will be waiting for you when you get back. If you get better and decide that you don’t want to continue in finance, that’s fine too. It’s your decision to make when you’re well."

It was a very moving email, but the most amazing part is he has lived up to each and every promise made, as well as going above and beyond to take care of me and my family.

As I look back today, I realize that for a long time while my boss supported me, I was so focused on the negative things going on in my life that I never stopped to appreciate what he was doing. My mind was so consumed with anger and frustration about tests and doctor's visits that I didn't care to notice the bright spots. But all that did was make me even more miserable.

See in life, you can either be someone who is struggling with problems, or someone who is not struggling with problems. For those people who aren't struggling, it's very easy to be thankful because everything is going well. For those people who are struggling, it's much harder to be thankful because you're angry and upset about your problems, and you can't figure out why they're happening to you and not someone else.

But what I've learned is that this type of thinking is a mental trap. If you only focus on your problems and fail to appreciate the bright spots in your life, you'll only feel worse. But if you push through those struggles to find those positive pillars in your life, and then be thankful for those things, you will feel more relaxed and peaceful. I realized that my life was not as bad as it could have been. There were still many people helping and supporting me, people I was very lucky to have around.

I've continued to focus on being thankful through each setback and each stressful situation I've encountered. I think that if you're struggling or stressed out in life, you should try focusing on the good things and being thankful for those things. This change in mentality has given me much greater peace of mind as I continue fighting this battle. As for my boss, he continues to support me to this day, and I can't wait to get back and start working for him everyday again.